Yidos

Footie time. And when we go to the footie, it's Spurs or nothing.

Tottenham Hotspur Football Club.
Wasn't allowed in here. Sulk. Sulk.
Security keeps a close eye on the centre spot.
The Blue Army settles in.
A cock. Dressed as a cock.

'Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough.'
The match officials leave their guide dogs on the touch-line before getting down to work.
There is a short pause while a Spurs winger checks in with the STD clinic.
And they're off.

This was home to Portsmouth at White Hart Lane. 43 seconds later and Spurs scrambled one in. If this was the olympics, they would have been penalised on artistic interpretation. But is wasn't - so there. A barely disputed penalty secured the second and Portsmouth got a consolation goal. 2-1 Portsmouth. Put that where the sun don't shine.