Perth - Brandy

America is about to try and shoot down one of its own satellites. This spy-bird failed before reaching orbit and is on its way back down. Everybody thinks they will try to shoot it down to stop its spy-tech from falling into the wrong (right?) hands - despite official platitudes about 'safety' - but the real reason is that, if nothing is done soon, it will smack right into the centre of Perth.

Why? Brandy - aka Jabba the Mutt - has reached such gigantic proportions, she now has her own gravity field.

Satellite Magnet.

Perth - Fremantle Prison

Roots - In search of the bread thieves.

Fremantle has a prison. An old prison. It started off full of convicts and then went on to house WA'a ne'er do wells until only a few years ago. Think tats, mullets, and Guns and Roses.

The main gate.
Once inside, it is dominated by the main cell block.
There are even tennis courts - probably not an original facility.
The gantries are where the guards hung out and the walls are painted white so that you can see an escapees at night.
Inside the main cell block. This was split into 4 sections, the badder you were, the further away from the kitchens was your cell. This is the ground floor with a suicide-net to catch the falling bodies. Not sure that all of the suicides were actually voluntary, though.
One of the exercise yards. Prisoners spent most of the day just hanging around here. The toilets are at the far end and, from what our guide told us about what went on there, a strong bladder is probably a very good idea indeed. The roof was a late addition. Before that they were in what ever the weather threw at them.
Where the guard stood to keep an eye on things. Good idea, all those bars.
A more salubrious yard - still with those best-avoided toilets.
Our guide - previously a prisoner or guard. He wouldn't tell us which but he was probably a guard - there was a certain amount of relish in the tales of incarceration.
A bit higher up the main block.
The chapel.
A painting on one of the cell walls - by a prisoner. It's true, most of the paintings around the place were about the outside.
The best photo I could get of one of the original-size cells. Not very good because the light isn't very good and it's so small, you can't get a good enough angle on it.
A more 'modern' cell. This one had it's own exercise yard - not because the prisoner was higher up the pecking order. On the contrary - these were the guys who had to be kept seperate from everybody else. They were mostly ex-cops, ex-prison guards or peadophiles.
And this is where you go if you were a very naughty boy indeed.

And now to answer that question - I checked with the guide whether, if you are English and you marry an Australian, there is a convict-return program. No, apparently.

Perth - Bell Tower

It's a tower. With bells. In Perth.

On the way to the tower, we ran into these guys. Amazingly, they are not splattered all over the side of the road.
Saucy minx.
A tree - well, I like it, anyway.
Aha, the tower. The plan was that WE were going to have a look around. When Kim discovered that it was an actual VERTICAL tower - you know, with HEIGHT - she decided that the best place to look at it was from under a nice shady tree; leaving all the tough climbing to me. That was just before I found the lift!
It's right next to the ferry terminal - which is on the river.
Vertical, see.
Promised you bells - you get bells.
More bells.
OK, this is the room where the bell-ringers go. Yes, they actually have people to ring them by pulling on those ropes. I could probably have knocked them up something that ran under Linux but, oh no, they want to do it all by hand. Bloody Luddites.
Because it's a bell tower, and, sometimes, bells go in clocks, there's a clock.

This tower is very nice but, really, it sounds awful. They don't use the bells to play tunes - which would be nice, a kind of giant music box by the water - they use it to play 'peels'. As in those loud tuneless cacophonic jumbles designed to get you out of bed before the pubs are open on a Sunday - as if - in order to go to church - likewise.

Perth - Rockingham

A few Km down the coast is Rockingham - a small seaside town. Hardly worth the trip, really, except for the fact that it does have a really good snorkelling area.

This is where the wheat comes to be loaded onto ships - thus this big thingy.
This gun is off a ship that was deliberately sunk when it reached the end of its useful life - sadly in water too deep to make a useful dive site. Presumably, the gun now keeps away any nefarious wheat thiefs (and, by implication, their evil twins; the loaf thiefs). Bit of a change from the time the were welcomed, etc, etc.
And the entry-point for said snorkelling beach. It's good because it is right next to a car park and has easy access. Downside; you have to pick your times - there are strong onshore winds that turn this place into a washing machine.

Perth - Xmas Dinner

Me. Eating xmas dinner.

When I've finished this one, I'm going to eat that other one over there.

Perth - Hillarys Boat Harbour

As just about all there is here is coast, we decided to have a little drive along it. A few Km north, is this lovely little place.

It's got a harbour - as you'd expect.
A boat ramp.
Some very sheltered beaches for the kids.
And a shopping centre - whatever that is for.

Perth - Sunset in the Ocean

Big day today. Kim has never seen the sun set into the ocean - though she has seen the sun rise out of the ocean, which is the same thing, really, only backwards. On the west coast, you've got to get your kicks where you find them.

WA is a dog-unfriendly state. They do, however, have a few dog beaches. Usually, the grottiest and hardest to get to.
The sun! Setting! Into the ocean!
Likewise.
Er, that's it.
The dunes are getting dark which means only one thing. Young and old alike, with no better place to go, flock down, strip off and wantonly ravage each other's naked, fleshy bodies (albeit in a sand-up-the-bum sort of way). Sinfully pleasuring themselves, they bringing down the wrath of the almighty and their inevitable slide into the depths of hades where devils and imps torture their evil souls for eternity.
On the other hand, maybe not.

Perth - Fremantle

This was a quick look-see in Fremantle. We located a few places we want to go back to...

Obviously, not this boat cos it would probably be gone.
That's the harbour - there's more boats in it.
Another boat - beginning to see a pattern, here.
Aha. Boats start to get interesting. They sink!
A old building. With a ball. No doubt, something to do with boats.
I have in my hand a piece of paper? Naa, couldn't be that stupid.

Perth - Kings Park

A quick look around Kings Park, here - and we've already had one quick look around on the City Bus. Why quick? As we are beginning to find out, Perth, in fact all of WA, hates dogs. You can't take them anywhere and that includes the interesting bits of the park.

While Perth is on a river, it is a big fat one - fat enough to look like a harbour. This is looking south.
Actual trees, aparently. Dunno what they were thinking, evolving like that.
More of your city skyline shot.
And the war memorial.

Right, that's it. Let's smuggle the dog out before some bastard fines us.